Sunday, January 31, 2010

I can never go back!

Sunday dinner today was a culinary experiment that turned out pretty dang good. I’ve got so I just log on to one of my favorite “healthy recipe” websites, type in a short list of the meat and veggies I have in the kitchen, click enter, and through the miracle of the WWW, up pops 25 or 30 nutritious dishes to choose from that are based on the ingredients I have on hand. Today I made roasted pork tenderloin, and something that can be best described as the carrot’s answer to creamy tomato soup. I also whipped up some kind of low cal, low fat, creamy-cauliflower dish. The soup turned out like nothing I’d ever seen before but it was pretty tasty. The whole meal totaled to about 400 calories, which is not bad for what is traditionally the biggest, richest, meal of the week.

The other night, I tried on a few leather jackets that I’d had stashed in the closet for several years, and would you believe that they all fit? I also slipped into three more pairs of dress slacks that I’d previously outgrown and they fit as well. I still have a good ways to go to get into most of my suits, dress shirts, and spot coats, but it won’t be long until I can wear them all.

I stayed up until 2:30am that same night reading my old journals. I found that back in 2000, I weighed 340 lbs. A few months later I was down to 280 but I was only there for a short time. Sadly it was another failed attempted at crash dieting that ended with me getting heavier than ever. The good news is, what I am doing now is not a diet! My healthy habits had a beginning but they have no end. I do catch myself once in a while craving some of the massive quantities of junk food that I used to eat, and I think briefly that “when this is over, I’m going to get me a bunch of that”, but then I snap out of the destructive reverie and remind myself that this is not a diet. There is no looking forward to a time when I can go back to eating the way the “old me” once did. Sure I’ll indulge in a small amount of some of those kinds of foods, but I can never go back to the way things were.

2 comments:

  1. Congrats on the leather jackets! You know, I have had the same thoughts about "when this is over, then I can have this or that..." but I know it's not the right thing to do. If I think about living this way for the rest of my life, it overwhelms me. The difference between you and me is that I am a wife and mom of eight people who have become accustomed to eating a certain way. It makes permanent change a little more of a challenge. I am still taking it one day at a time.

    I'm toying with the idea of the Delta 5K now more than ever.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Rachel,

    Keep "toying" with the Delta 5k idea. No one says we have to go fast or anything.

    ReplyDelete